Bubble City Meets Cloud City
When I was a kid, I loved Star Wars. I had pretty much every collectible known to man. I had the movies, the soundtracks on vinyl, the action figures, bed sheets, curtains, talking Ewoks…all of it. My first word as a baby was “Yoda.” I had a severe mental complex that had me thinking that I was actually Luke Skywalker bulls-eying womp rats on Tatooine for much of my childhood. I lived and breathed Star Wars.
I eventually grew out of my SW phase and moved on to more sophisticated movies like The Wizard and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but every now and then, my brain will snap and I’ll see the world in Star Wars vision again. This week, I took a hard look at the Champaign-Urbana local music scene and made stunning comparisons of people in our local universe to people in the galaxy far, far away.
1. Larry Gates / Master Yoda
Yoda was one of the most respected and revered Jedi in the galaxy; Larry Gates is one of the most respected and revered musicians our town has witnessed. Just like Yoda, he saw the fall of the local music scene on Green St., but returned as an unstoppable force to bring people back to downtown Champaign.
2. Krukid / Boba Fett
If you’ve never performed alongside, opened for or headlined Krukid, then you’re not a real musician. Like the most infamous bounty hunter of all time, Krukid has rubbed shoulders with almost anyone local who has talent.
3. Todd Hunter / C-3PO
Threepio is fluent in six million forms of communication. Todd Hunter is as fluent in local music trivia. For years, Todd has interviewed countless artists and has seen more local music shows than anyone. Still, no one knows what this guy does for a living.
4. Dave Dickey / Droopy McCool
Dave and Droopy actually both played for Jabba once.
5. Matt Harshbarger / Jabba the Hutt
Harsh, a business man, promoter, gangster and emcee. Jabba, a businessman, promoter a gangster and emcee. They’ve gotta be related.
6. John Hoeffleur / Han Solo
Han never wanted to be a hero, but always seems to find himself in the weirdest of situations. Just like Han, John never wanted to be known as a one of the kings of the scene. This rebel scum just wanted to smuggle his spice all day.
7. Tom Grassman / Chewbacca
Seriously, this guy has got a lot of hair.
8. Ward Gollings / Darth Vader
Feared across the city and being known for ending music careers, Darth Ward rules the local music scene with a dark hand.
9. Brandon T. Washington / Mace Windu
Well, it’s Brandon T. Washington! I mean come on!
10. Michael “Guido” Esteves / Greedo
Not because their names sound similar, but because we’re told by many women that he always “shoots first.”
11. Illini Media Company / The Galactic Empire
Let’s face it. They control what we hear, what we read, what we see and even what think. They own you, everything that you own and this town—until the Rebel Alliance forms.
8 comments
Han Solo
Who you calling scruffy-looking?
Self-serving but I like this - very, very much. Good one Nate.
Han again
Meaning it serves me so of course I like it - a great compliment to be cast as Han.
Mike Ingram
mundaywas
That is…weird. We just think alike…Mike.
bozak
please to make follow up article with more comparisons.
princess leah
jabas right had man (bib fortuna?)
jabas little pet
lando calrisian (my favorite)
mon mothma
admiral akbar
the dude with three eyes, ree-yees
that big ass monster that luke killed
the sarlack pit
liz
man that was alright. i mean, slightly one sided, and the harsh metaphor was fucking harsh. and really do you need to be boosting john hoeffleur’s ego like that, seriously???
jabba the harsh
[url=“http://a799.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/94/l_66114d7a6f0f0058f565bb3b9e2b2dce.jpg”]
forgot an important one[/url]
http://openid.aol.com/LucidLibra
Bahahahahaaaa!!!
Nice, Nate. Honestly, if someone can’t find the humor in all of this, then they really need to lighten the hell up.
Kudos to Nate for making this one good, kudos to the musicians that can recognize the humor in this, and last but certainly not least, kudos to harsh for the comparison on Nate Jones. Word.
Most Recent Music Comments
Nice article, love the Dead quote in the beginning. If they can get down here to Central FL I’ll definitely be heading out to the show. Some of my friends have finally stopped wincing when I say “jam band.“ I’ve now tried my best at more descriptive…
good call on that Herring recording, Josh. Love that version of Exit Music….here’s a clip of the Cinco de Mayo show (from about six months prior). As I recall, this Shakedown went on for roughly a half hour, while getting into the Trampled Underfoot jam in the…
sux
whats a zmick?
Here is a link to download the aformentioned 2007 show at Red Herring, a true gem from the early Zmick archive, again recorded by Ben Valocchi: http://www.archive.org/details/zmick2007-11-02.logitech
My biggest concern is that the free Caribou show at the Krannert is now not at the Krannert and no longer free. But then, I guess if that’s my biggest concern, then I’m doing pretty well—at least I still have potable water! Still, I would prefer it…
Who’s got the crack?
Any band that makes the effort to pay homage to ! = Metallica @ = Beatles # = 2pac $ = Moldy Peaches % = Grateful Dead ^ = Dave Clark 5 All in one show! (with Herb Alpert interpolations to boot) That’s what tasty jams is all about
THE CAKE IS A LIE
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Illinois has simply had no luck at all in these Mizzou games. None. I think maybe we’re do for a couple of bounces to go our way. If we get one or two (or sever or eight) breaks, I think it’s a win.
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Timbo makes a smart, sound argument. Reread it.
I joined on 09-09-09 after living here over a year, and having to listen to my dad tell me how his best friend is, like, #27 or something crazy like that, and how said friend never lived further than 50 feet from the Illini Inn while going…
And, I might add, no one is being prevented from using the Champaign library. They are just being asked to pay their fair share if they are going to use it as their primary library.
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Looks like you are also all members of the killer sideburns club.
Thanks for the article, Ben. I was not familiar with this band until now and even though I won’t be able to attend the show on Friday they are now on my radar. A *good* jam band is hard to find, and these folks appear to fill…
Nice article, love the Dead quote in the beginning. If they can get down here to Central FL I’ll definitely be heading out to the show. Some of my friends have finally stopped wincing when I say “jam band.“ I’ve now tried my best at more descriptive…
@Annie: Yeah, my bad. That was the best part! Drinking + memory exercises = fun @Rob: According to Ask the English Teacher, “My dictionary says ‘drunk’ is an archaic past tense of ‘drink.‘“ We’re all about the new grammar around here.
Katie, have the residents of Savoy and Tolono thought about having their taxes raised a little to help their public library expand? That’s a possibility for them. And then everybody wins.
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Thanks for the article, Ben. I was not familiar with this band until now and even though I won’t be able to attend the show on Friday they are now on my radar. A *good* jam band is hard to find, and these folks appear to fill…