Smile Politely. Speak Directly. A Champaign-Urbana Culture Blog

Continuing with the acclaimed series, Caucasian Darlings of the Blogosphere, this week we’ll take a closer look at Brian Bannister of the Kansas City Royals. Many of you White Sox fans probably remember Bannister’s father, Floyd, who went 50–49 for the South Siders from 1983 to 1986. Both father and son are starting pitchers who are a shade over six feet tall and around 200 lbs, but that’s where their similarities on the diamond end. The elder Bannister was a left-handed power pitcher who led the league in strikeouts with the Seattle Mariners in 1982, while the younger is a righty induces outs with a fairly pedestrian high-80’s fastball. In fact, Brian had one of the lowest strikeout rates in the league last year, his rookie season, when he struck out just a hair over 4 batters per 9 innings pitched.

The Cardinals are still hanging in there. The pitching has remained pretty decent to almost great and the hitting has been just good enough to win more than a few ballgames. I would have been much happier if they could have managed to put a hurting on the lowly Giants, but they took two of three from the Astros, so that will suffice. It’s at least better to play tough within your own division. The team still doesn’t seem that great on paper, but since that isn’t where the games are played, I suppose that’s just fine. I’ve been frustrated quite a lot with the managing so far this year, so I feel I should write about that this week.

I’m just going to admit it. Tony LaRussa is smarter than me about baseball.

It might not have been how he was hoping it would happen, but J Leman is still going to try out for a slot on football's biggest stage: the NFL.

After injuring his ankle in the Rose Bowl and having to sit out the East-West Shrine game and the NFL combine, the All-American from Champaign had dropped some stock in the past three months since he led the Illini to their first winning season in six years. After he wasn't picked up in the NFL draft over the past weekend, he was signed as a free agent by the Minnesota Vikings, a team that has no need for any new linebackers at the moment. Leman's position in college, middle linebacker, is firmly held by E.J. Henderson, the Vikings' leading tackler.

If one more good horse is scratched off the Kentucky Derby trail, I swear I’m going to pull an Elvis and shoot my TV. News broke Saturday that Eclipse winning champion War Pass suffered a hairline fracture in his left front ankle and will take a break from racing until it is healed. The injury is not fatal, but it will keep him out of the entire Triple Crown, making War Pass just another head in the list of true competitors scratched off the Derby trail. He joins the company of Georgie Boy and Crown of Thorns, two talented horses who would have greatly improved the quality of the field in the Kentucky Derby were it not for small injuries.

I spend my days editing and acquiring sports non-fiction books. I also often spend my nights reading sports non-fiction books, which makes for a lot of sports reading — probably too much. In light of the arrival of both spring and the baseball season, I’m sharing some recent baseball reads that you may find of interest.

Most middle relievers are faceless automatons, marching in from the bullpen to a generic nu-metal dirge to face a few hitters and disappear into the dugout. Take Mike Stanton, for example. He’s been in the major leagues since 1989, but if you asked me to pick him out of a police lineup, I’m pretty sure I’d guess Curt Leskanic by mistake. That’s what makes Pat Neshek so special: he’s turned a thankless role in the Minnesota Twins’ bullpen into a sort of cult celebrity status in less than two full years in the big leagues.

I guess when you're young, it's easier to watch movies without constantly questioning the director's motives, the lack of script continuity, or significant lapses in credibility. Suspension of disbelief is not required for the young, because the young believe in everything.

For example, I liked Indiana Jones & The Temple of Doom when I was thirteen. But when I was thirteen, I didn't demand that plots make sense. I didn't really demand plots, actually. I'm older now, and jaded.

I watched Temple of Doom the other day. It's terrible.

Long Game

I had to start out the column this week talking about the twenty two inning marathon in San Diego last Thursday. It was the longest game in Major League Baseball since Aug. 31, 1993 clocking in at six hours and sixteen minutes. It ended at 3:21 a.m. CST when pitcher and former Cub Glendon Rusch took a called third. I enjoyed the heck out of the Cubs this week, but I’d have to think twice about staying up until past 3 a.m. for a game in April.

Then again, how often do you get chance to see your leadoff man get 10 AB’s in one contest? Another reason why I love this game: No time. No clock. Just innings, top and bottom.

I don’t much care to join the debate over whether the Big Ten Network is in the wrong or Comcast should be blamed for the cable provider’s ongoing refusal to carry the Big Ten Network. Regardless of who is ultimately to blame — and the likely truth is that it’s both of ’em to some degree — I’m still without the Big Ten Network, despite reports that the two sides are close to agreement. The only one getting screwed in this process is me, the fan.

And Comcast hasn’t improved its Q rating by choosing not to pick up an extra twenty Cardinals games that Fox Sports Midwest is offering. On Tuesday night I waited with bated breath for the first-place Cardinals to take on the second-place Brewers. After all, this was the first time in the last fifty years (and, quite possibly, ever) of Major League Baseball that two opposing teams would each bat the pitcher eighth in the order. (Yes, these are the sorts of thrills that I look forward to on a daily basis.)

I would start a barroom brawl in the defense of my Derby horse if he was unjustly criticized, and that’s nearly what happened on the rail at Keeneland when a drunken ox with an ape brain shouted, “No Derby for you, huh, number seven!”

Yes, at that moment, I about lost it. It was not a good day for Pyro, (number seven for those people who can’t read letters), who went off as the even money favorite at 1–1 in the Toyota Blue Grass Stakes. Coming off two impressive wins in Louisiana, Pyro descended upon synthetic track for the first time and met disaster.

Two weeks into the season, and everything remains convoluted in the AL Central. Up is down, white is black, and the Royals are decent. Let’s make a run-through of the standings from top to bottom:

Chicago White Sox (8–5): The Sox are using the same combination so far this season that led to their World Series title in 2005: pitching and the long ball. Gavin Floyd was effectively wild on a frigid Saturday afternoon, taking a no-hitter into the eighth inning against the Tigers before combining with a couple of relievers on a two-hit shutout. A.J. Pierzynski is still tearing things up to the tune of a .412 batting average and .737 slugging percentage, both of which lead the AL. Joe Crede has also come back from back surgery to get off to a great start, hitting two grand slams already this season.

Okay, I’ll admit it: I’m very happy and somewhat surprised by the Cardinals so far this season.

Sure, we’re towards the top of the standings, but that’s not why I’m happy necessarily. We’ve had great pitching thus far, and though that gives me a nervous thrill, that’s not even why I’m happy. Our hitting looks functional and our defense looks vastly improved, but even those things aren’t really why I’m so happy with the redbirds.

I’m happy because they are once again fun to watch.

A Quick Note About Detroit

A trip around the second week of the season and nothing is particularly out of the ordinary. The biggest surprise remains the Tigers horrid start, and while still too early to mean much, the more concerning part for Detroit shouldn’t be that they’ve lost ten of their first twelve games, but how they’ve lost the games.

They are getting punished.

The well-publicized injuries in their bullpen have left them scrambling. A quick glance at their pen’s ERA and you’ll see ballooned figures like Zach Minor at 11.57 or ex-cub Francis Beltran at 7.36. What’s worse is that they put the D-Train on the DL yesterday. It’s too early to hit the panic button, but let’s just say I’m glad that 2–10 is not happening to the Cubbies.

No one pegged the Cardinals to win the N.L. Central this year, but after ten games they find themselves atop the division, a half-game ahead of the Brewers and the streaking Cubs. You can put me among those skeptics. I felt this team had as much of a chance of winning the division as Neifi Perez had in finding his stroke, landing with the Yankees, displacing Alex Rodriguez at third base and making his first All-Star team. (I don’t think they currently market that strong of a performance-enhancing drug.)

It’s a topsy-turvy AL Central after one week of play. Here are the standings as of this morning:

Chicago White Sox 5–2
Kansas City Royals 5–2
Cleveland Indians 4–4
Minnesota Twins 3–5
Detroit Tigers 0–7

The biggest surprise in the standings above is, of course, the Tigers. Detroit went into the season as the prohibitive favorite in the division, after upgrading at third base (Miguel Cabrera > Brandon Inge), shortstop (Edgar Renteria > Carlos Guillen), first base (Carlos Guillen > Sean Casey), and fourth starter (Dontrelle Willis > cracked bat > Mike Maroth). It’s much too early to give up on the Tigers, but frustration is clearly mounting in Detroit.

Bill Self brought glory back to Lawrence, KS last night as the Jayhawks performed a miracle comeback against the Memphis Tigers, eventually sealing the victory in overtime with strong play from Mario Chalmers, the Final Four's MOP. It was Kansas' first title since 1988 when Danny Manning (and the Miracles) defeated Oklahoma 84–79.

How does this relate to us in the cornfields of Illini Nation?

First week in the books

The first official week of baseball is now complete and we learned, once again, why the experts get paid the big bucks. Let’s start in Detroit where the Tigers thanked all sportswriters near and far for picking them to win the World Series by starting the season 0–6. And then of course, ladies and gentleman, let me present to you your 2008 St. Louis Cardinals. Picked by many for fifth place in the lowly NL central. How about a 5–1 opening week with the best ERA in the league? What does the Tigers opening flop and the Redbirds strong start mean?

Nothing, of course.

This is baseball. 156 games to go.

Finally, games that count have arrived. For better or worse, that means the Cardinals took the field this week. The Redbirds then promptly played in a game that didn’t count, an Opening Day rainout that washed away an Albert Pujols home run. Funny how that happens. Opening Day redux ended with Rockies starter Kip Wells getting the best of his former team. Ouch. But St. Louis rebounded to take the series with a win on Thursday. All told, they allowed the reigning N.L. champs just five runs in three games.

Getting back to my last column — a silly expedition in selecting the best players in the N.L. Central — I must carry on where I left off and identify the pitchers who will surely shine this season, given my blessing. We’ll start with a rotation, then build a pen.

There’s only going to be one Opening Day this year, so that calls for a running diary of the White Sox vs. Indians clash, straight from Jacobs... er... Progressive Field. Here we go…

Pregame: Comcast brings the Nickelback the opening and Illinois couldn’t be more thrilled. Something about “The Show,” so it’s major league-ready.

Top 1st: Indians are rocking the throwback uniforms, or perhaps just a new look this season. They even have a new cap design with 100% less racist caricature. It’s good to see that C.C. Sabathia didn’t let a little thing like a Cy Young award change his conditioning program this offseason. He may have even put on a few pounds. Orlando Cabrera walked and stole second, and then Jim Thome followed with an absolute bullet into the right-center seats. No further damage for the Sox, and we’re 2-0 after a half-inning.

Somewhere, there is a group of people currently discussing what went wrong. Boards, points in the paint, 3-point shots, dribble penetration, free throws, officiating, coaching, hustle, turnovers — all of it perhaps.

They might be Wisconsin fans. They could very easily be Michigan State fans. Certainly, Indiana fans are scratching their heads. Illinois fans have already made their scalps bleed.

This is the current state of Big Ten basketball. It’s a head-scratcher, as they say. In the last decade, there has not been a time when the conference was so completely written off by the media — and then proved the media right on the court. Both Michigan State and Wisconsin lost in the Sweet 16. And they not only lost, they got handled.

Next year will different, though. No doubt about it.

It’s hard to know what to think of the St. Louis Cardinals this coming year. Like a first trip to a Thai restaurant, I’m both excited and fearful. Actually, it may be more comparable to taking home an insanely drunk girl after last call. I’m fairly sure it will be sloppy, with a few exciting moments, eventually leaving me with a sort of unclean feeling. In reality, it will probably be most like a cancer patient: good days and bad days with an ending I had dreaded yet totally anticipated. The Cardinals may end up being just fine, but I really have my doubts.