Smile Politely

The Dapper Crapper:  Dec. 16

With all the character that comes along with a culturally vibrant community like Champaign-Urbana, we can often overlook the more utilitarian features we see day in and day out.  But C-U’s restrooms, wash basins, lavatories, water closets and powder rooms are all a shining feature of our community’s fabric, even if they do not literally shine.  Smile Politely decided to look closer at the matter at hand (in the bowl?) to showcase a few of these porcelain playgrounds in the first installment of the series the Dapper Crapper.

First up, the basement restroom of University of Illinois School of Art and Design:



crapperRating:  Crapper

Although I did chuckle a the “lol poetry” tag, my vote is undoubtedly crapper.  While sometimes mildly amusing drawings are abundant, the restroom is dominated by laughably horrific tags and mediocre cartoons.  Is this not the art school?  Where is the art?  Or more appropriately, why in the hell are you bringing paint into the bathroom anyway?  Do you really spend that much time in there? 

Next up, Guido’s:  


Rating:  Crapper. 

While I must admit it was one of the cleaner facilities, it has the color scheme similar to what I imagine Martha Stewart’s prison cell would look like.

Next, we have Mike N Molly’s:



dapperRating:  Dapper

The restroom is always clean, encourages graffiti, and the local bands that frequent have certainly given it a unique charm.  And that tuxedo-inspired color theme?  Totally dapper.

And finally, the University of Illinois Erlanger Residence:



Rating:  Dapper

The Erlanger Residence was originally designed for a dance professor in 1964. There is a ton of natural light from the huge windows but virtually no privacy due to open channels in the floor next to the toilet and shower.  So be loud, be proud and consider yourself lucky if your cheeks grace the hippest place to pop a squat in Urbana.

Do you know of a particularly pleasant potty? Are you partial to a peculiar pooper? Let us know and we’ll investigate.

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