Smile Politely

Central Illinois’ friendliest festival

Adrian — Dustin — Stephanie

For all its pointy piercings and menacing growls, Central Illinois Metalfest is maybe the friendliest fest in town.

Hands are clasped convivially and smiling badasses talk bands and unspeakable acts of fornication over hours of beer and banging.

“People are nice as fuck here,” said Stephanie from Ohio. “In Cincinnati everyone’s a shithead so we act like shitheads. But here is crazy.”

“At most shows you walk up to the bands and they’re like, ‘What the fuck do you want?'” said Farmer City’s Dustin. “Here it’s great, one even let me show them my vocals.”

Metalfest really is a good opportunity to meet bands. After each set they can be found lounging behind merch tables and clinking beers with attendees. It’s like the only thing separating them from the crowd is a different colored wristband.

Also mentioned was a slight but noticeable lack of women.

“Of the sausage fest shows I’ve been to, this is the most so,” said Dustin

“It’s like this everywhere,” said Stephanie. “I go to a lot of shows so I’m used to it.

“Guys are always giving you shit. Guys are always trying to fuck you.”

While discussing this, SikFuk was onstage.

“This one’s about two guys and a whore. But the guys don’t want to pay. But they still want to get up on that crusty ass shit at the same time…”

That was from the song “Dead Hooker Double Penetration.”

Chats with others about metal in Central Illinois inevitably pointed back up towards Chicago, St. Louis or the coasts, though the band Lividity of Peoria has hit it big. And other, smaller groups carry the banner south of I-80.

Anyway, the music remains excellent and the people are even better. There’s still time to get your money’s worth from a one day pass. Late tonight should be worthy Chaos.

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