Smile Politely

News Gazette to publish fortnightly

John Foreman, editor of the News-Gazette, announced today that the newspaper will begin publishing bimonthly starting in June.

“The print media are suffering,” Foreman said. “To keep competitive, we are forced to cut back on the number of pages we publish as well as the frequency of publication.”

The Gazette announced earlier this month that it would begin publishing solely in a morning edition, causing many of the paper’s school-age carriers to resign in protest. 

“Publishing less frequently will help us to stop losing so many of our carriers,” Foreman continued. “Those kids are the life’s blood of the newspaper business anyway.  Now they can sleep in and not have to get up at 4 a.m.  At least not every day.”

Happy April Fool’s Day from Smile Politely.

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